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To Help or Hinder
The role of a mother or parent in the life of a child is one of the most important relationships that a child will ever have. With the confusion of adolescence surrounding today's youth, teenagers are torn between following the path of their parents or breaking free and experiencing life for themselves. In Janice Mirikitani's "Suicide Note, the parents are completely involved in their child's life to the point of dominance. The daughter feels that if she doesn't life up to the parent's expectations, that life is not worth living. In William Faulkner's short story "Barn Burning" Ab Snopes, the father, is a poor sharecropper and onetime horse thief who takes out his frustrations against the post-Civil War aristocracy by burning barns. Sarty, his adolescent son, detests his father's destructiveness.
Sarty must make a choice between loyalty to his family and his own beliefs. He cannot live with his father's expectations for life and still hold his own beliefs. "More and more parents are imposing adult standards of success and achievement on children, jumping on the early-learning bandwagon and pushing their kids to excel at earlier and earlier ages." (New Internationalist) In "Barn Burning", the father is callus, dishonest, and rebellious against the country after the war. By burning barns of higher class people, he feels that he is fulfilling this rebellion. Sarty realizes, after many of his father's callous actions that he can no longer tolerate his family's way of life. "There was something about his wolflike independence and even courage when the advantage was at least neutral which impressed strangers, as if they got from his latent ravening ferocity not so much a sense of dependability as a feeling that his ferocious conviction in the rightness of his own actions would be of advantage to all whose interest lay with his." (Faulkner) Knowing that he cannot change his father's ways and beliefs, he must make a decision. He knows that the only way to escape his life is to run away and leave his family.
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His father's expectation to cover for his crimes and defend his father is no longer tolerable. "You were fixing to tell them. You would have told him….You're getting to be a man. You got to learn. You got to learn to stick to your own blood or you ain't going to have any blood to stick to you." (Faulkner, p 77) When his father tells him that he must lie for him because he is family, he realizes that by lying for his father he is accepting his father's actions. By telling the truth and confessing to the actions of his father that only then can he be free. By doing this, he will be abandoned by the only family he has ever known.
In Janice Mirikitanis's poem "The Suicide Note" the child is also feeling that she cannot live up to her parents expectations of her. In this poem, it is academic pressure that she cannot endure. In her academics she has tried to please her parents by excellence in her studies but has found that this is not possible. "I apologize for disappointing you. I have worked very hard, not good enough harder, perhaps to please you."(Mirikitani) Her despair is evident throughout the whole poem because she keeps stating "not good enough, not good enough" ( Mirikitani) She realizes that the pressure for her to succeed is just too much for her.
Her parents expect excellence from their daughter and will apparently accept nothing less that excellence. "Unfortunately, in some societies, concern about disappointing one's parents is a tragedy that a student cannot deal with, so they kill themselves…Parents, therefore, have to watch out that they do not push their children above their capabilities."(Soundvision) This child feels that her grades falling below excellence has shamed and disgraced her family. Unfortunately, she feels that the expectations put on her by her parents cannot be met so she chooses death as her only means of escape.
Both children were faced with awakenings and decisions that would ultimately alter their lives. For Sarty, his awakening allowed him to break free of his father's dictatorship. This allowed him to leave his way of life and begin anew with a life that was governed by his own beliefs and emotions. Unfortunately, for the daughter in the poem "The Suicide Note" she escaped the expectations placed on her by her parents, but she will never be able to realize her own expectations for her life because she thought death was the only method of escape.
Works Cited
"New Internationalist The hurried child Kathlees McDonnell looks at how children are being pushed on to the fast track to adult success by cynical advertisers and anxious parents." March 00. 5 February 00. http//www.findarticles.com/cf_0/mOJQP/00_March/8406140
Faulkner, William. "Barn Burning." Legacies Fiction, Poetry, Frama, Nonfiction. Second Edition. Carly Rees Bogarad and Jan Zlotnick Schmidt. Harcourt Inc. 15. 74-87
Mirikitani, Janice. "Suicide Note." Legacies Fiction, Poetry, Frama, Nonfiction. Second Edition. Carly Rees Bogarad and Jan Zlotnick Schmidt. Harcourt Inc. 15. 166-168
"Choosing a Career The Clash Between Our Children's Goals and Our Goals For Them." April 00. 5 February 00. http//www.soundvision.com/Info/education/career/career.clash.asp
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